Recent content by Jane

I defended last fall. I hated my dissertation so much by year five that I couldn't look at it without feeling sick. Here's what got me through: The "dissertation is a job" mindset. I stopped waiting for inspiration. I clocked in at 9am. Clocked out at 5pm. Lunch at noon. No writing on weekends...

Your friend is right though. Passion left my project around year three. Now it's just... a spreadsheet of tasks. Show up. Do the thing. Leave. That's not depressing. That's called work. You can do work. You've done harder things.

For years, I thought my dissertation had to be perfect. It had to change the field. It had to be a masterpiece. I'd never finish. My advisor said: "Your dissertation doesn't have to change the world. It just has to be a solid contribution that you can finish." I didn't believe her. I thought...

I thought if I worked longer, I'd get more done. I stopped sleeping. I worked through the night. I wrote. I deleted. I wrote again. My writing got worse. Not better. I made mistakes. I lost track of arguments. I deleted things I should have kept. A friend told me to sleep. I said I couldn't...

I'm not sleeping. I'm not eating. I'm writing. Then deleting. Then writing again. My eyes hurt. My head hurts. My hands shake when I hold the mouse. I called my mom. She said I need to rest. I said I need to finish. She was quiet. I said I'm scared. She said she knows. She didn't tell me to...